Monday, November 16, 2009

You Can't Handle The Tooth!

Look at that guy. What a state. Feel free to laugh at him. Ha ha ha. I'm glad I don't look anything like him. He's missing at least three of his front teeth. No wonder I feel superior, I only broke TWO!!! Okay, one of the pair was fake but the other was strong and proud like a stalactite. But it was no match for the industrial strength chicken wing from the Whole Foods poultry section. (Isn't there a scene in Precious where something like this happens? God, I feel her pain...)
After greeting my messed-up mouth with a jovial `I knew you'd be back!", my local molar guy slotted me in for what he predicted would be a bloody extraction tomorrow morning, followed by the fitting of a gleaming new plate.
All of which is to say that if there is a new TV Club this week, my half of it will consist largely of drugged-up ramblings.


Anonymous said...

But I watched X Factor this week just to see what you'd say! Also: please save me some vicodin. Thanks! p.s. Team Stacey FTW.

Anonymous said...

p.p.s. Obviously, by vicodin I meant vitamins. Also: how will we know for sure that your ramblings are drug-fueled? Can you maybe put a jagged little pill symbol next to the druggy ones? Deal or no deal?

ThisGirl Lori said...

Whatchu talkin' bout, Greer? It's all about Jedward! They would've looked fine on the cover of Spin back in the day, yes?
Oh wait . . . this is Jonathan's blog. My condolences, Jables. But that's what you get for eating animals. But seriously, I miss you. Come back east. Soft tofu awaits. BTW, I love this TV Club thing!!! xo

Anonymous said...

Louis Walsh is hopping up and down excitedly and clapping his hands, Lori. I mean, perpetually. the Toxic Twins were entertaining, I'll admit, but... well... okay. As long as Simon loses, I'll be happy.